I’d like to start this article off with one statement that I believe to be true: It’s important to know yourself. We can agree on that, right? It’s the key to finding the right jobs and relationships. It’s how we can experience in a life that is totally soul nourishing and fills us up with a billion shades of YES every day. But when we don’t know ourselves, we get caught up with bandwagon after bandwagon. We buy into the formulas that every guru is selling, and we devour hungrily but feel unfulfilled.
But knowing yourself? That’s the ticket to feeling fully lit up.
I shared about this in The Tribepreneur Collective today, but thought it was important to blog about it here too. This morning in meditation, my mind wandered a bit, and I was thinking about my peers, and how I’ve watched them flourish since we’ve known each other. (I include my own growth in this reflection too, but right now I’m talking about what I witnessed from the outside.) One woman was in my peer-lead mastermind for about a year, making shifts and incremental progress, but then she chose to leave. Nothing happened. There was no big drama or catalyst for the decision, just a deep inner knowing that she needed to go at it alone. And sure enough, within a couple of months, things BOOMED. Was it because we were holding her back? Not us, specifically, but the group dynamic. She’s what I refer to as a Lone Wolf.
The Lone Wolf has to go at it alone. It’s how they remain focused on their task, their mission. It keeps them from comparing themselves to others. Their passion and their purpose are what drive them, fuel them, and anything else becomes a bit of a distraction. They are self-starters, voracious learners, and they can get every available nugget out of a book, e-course, or membership site. It’s not so much about introversion, though many Lone Wolves are introverts, it’s more about how they process information. And they do this by going solo.
On the other side of the spectrum is the Social Butterfly. These people are oral processors, they like to talk things out. They like to work socially (like in a co-work space, or virtually using Slack), set goals with someone outside of themselves for accountability. They thrive in group programs and likely enjoy the Facebook group community as much as the material itself. Their interactions with their peers are what give them the ability to make sense of all the ideas floating around in their heads so they can craft an executable plan. And while many extroverts may be social butterflies, an introverted social butterfly would need time alone to recharge after a busy day of flitting from flower to flower.
Neither option is better than the other. They’re just two ways of learning, processing information, and frankly, offering services that are more aligned to you. And this is why it’s important to know which you are. Because the Social Butterfly may sign up for an e-course because the content sounds great, but without a community behind it, or an accountability partner, there’s a good chance they won’t finish it. And likewise, if a Lone Wolf signed up for a group coaching program, they might not feel inspired to share their journey, or even show up. They’d be most likely to watch the calls on the replay, and treat it like a self study program instead.
Let’s learn about ourselves, and play to our strengths. Let’s invest in ourselves in the ways that are most aligned. Let’s deliver our services in a way that lights us all the way up. Let’s feel GOOD.
PS: Which are you? Lone wolf, or social butterfly? Tell me in the comments!