From late 2010 to early 2014, I had the privilige of balancing nearly 100 brains. In that time, I worked for two very different neurofeedback clinics, and had found a way, post-corporate living, to use my desire to help people in my work. Despite having zero qualifications before starting on this path, I was, in many ways, an ideal candidate.
- I’d lived a stressed out corporate life, and could empathize with my clients.
- I have a really analytical brain, so once I could master what I was looking at with the brain activity reports, I was a super quick study.
- I’m very sensitive and had a knack for really special care taking. I was a guide for vulnerable people in some of their scariest times (some of whom were on the brink of suicide before working with us), and I brought forward the right words and the right acts to help them feel at ease.
The rest was trainable.
But there was a VERY big difference between these two clinics I worked in, and this drastically impacted my ability to do this work.
Clinic A was deeply committed to managing the energy of the space. We had a little altar with crystals to support the client. We kept a rock salt lamp to neutralize some of the negative ions in the air. We cleared the energy between each client with sage and aura sprays. We paced the day so there was time to get everything done, and client care was always a priority. We also had generous discounts in the natural pharmacy, had regular access to a naturopath. They really viewed their staff holistically and understood the impact healthy (emotionally, mentally, energetically) people would have on their bottom line.
Clinic B ran like a corporation. The calendar was fully stocked with no space to breathe. I was explicitly told no woo-y things in the office (so I had sneaky crystals trying to do the heavy lifting of regular saging), and I ran the clinic by myself, so there wasn’t a lot in the way of energetic support for me. The focus was on creating good experiences for potential investors, not on the clients themselves, so my emotional investment wasn’t the same. It was a long commute, long days, and I had to be “on” more than not. Running the clinic myself meant there was no space for sick days (which would also have a ripple effect on all the back to back sessions lined up – I was booking about 2 months out), and no support.
Can you guess what happened next?
The week of my wedding in October, I had a client I was very close to pass away. It was a high stress time with last minute wedding details, in laws arriving from overseas, and still a very full calendar at the office. There was no space to process, or release. It was the beginning of the end of me. By January, I had to leave the job due to my declining mental health, and would spend the better part of a year recovering from debilitating anxiety and depression.
Read that again. A few months of neglecting my own energetic management while in one of the most stressful periods of my life was the perfect storm and took me out of service, to the people I was here to impact and help, for almost a year.
If anyone tries to tell me that energetic management is something they can do later, I provide them with that cautionary tale.
Today, knowing full well what the consequences are, energetic management is one of my biggest priorities. It’s deeply entrenched in my mental health, and when I start to feel pangs of anxiety come up without any visible cause, I know I’ve been neglecting something.
Here are some other things I’ve learned along the way…
Shit happens – it doesn’t matter how strong or resilient you are.
I’ve had some significant periods of hardship in my life. I grew up in a very rough neighbourhood surrounded by drugs, theft, and other crimes. My classmates often ended up pregnant, imprisoned, or dead before graduation. I had an unstable home life, moved out at 17 across the country from my family, and raised my sister through her teen years. None of this prepared me for my breakdown, and all of it seems worse in comparison, and yet – I was able to keep going despite all of this.
Energetic burn out does not discriminate, and it can be kinda contagious.
For some people it shows up as high blood pressure, for others it’s panic attacks, some will experience hives and skin flare ups. Stress comes with a price, but when we find different ways of managing it, and to slough off the debris we pick up (both from the stress, and the people around us), we can start to lessen the toll.
Stressful situations tend to be little energy sucking cesspools. I say that somewhat in jest, but think about it. Bad boss? You’re not the only one feeling the heavy mojo at work. Money stress at home? Your partner and kids are probably picking up on it too. We kind of feed off each other, so our energetic maintenance is ideally something done together (like in a family context), but at the very least, is part of our regular hygiene (think brushing your teeth for the soul) to be able to leave other people’s stuff at the door.
Your sensitivity is a gift, but needs to be maintained.
We are naturally sensitive, not only to what is happening around us, but to our own needs. Babies know when they are hungry, or tired, or need to be held or changed, and they make their needs known. Somewhere we grow out of that. We numb ourselves with stuff, with food, with sex, with alcohol. We try to tune out so we can keep going, but the body is still feeling all of that, and our energy systems are still picking up the garbage around us. We may be able to mentally check out, but all other systems are still online.
Energetic maintenance is an essential part of our ongoing health. We think of self care as bubble baths and massages, but it’s also things like fierce boundaries (which is amazing energetic maintenance btw!), honouring when our heart says NO, and slowing down to rest. It’s opening up the windows and burning some sage to clear the energy after an argument with your spouse. It’s ending the day with gratitude to keep the vibe high, which has the added benefit of attracting even more things to be grateful for – but I digress. It’s doing things with intention, it’s dancing when the heart feels called to – even if people will stare, it’s genuinely, vulnerably, truthfully connecting with the people you love. It’s saying yes to the stuff that lights you up and outsourcing the rest.
Seriously… just typing that felt good. It felt like I was powerfully claiming this truth for myself too. (Because I’m human, and I forget… procrastinate… neglect sometimes too.)
Here’s 5 things you can do to support your energetic health in under 5 minutes:
- Start each day with a prayer to Archangel Michael, asking him to cut the cords that bind you to the things that no longer serve. As you do, visualize him coming with his sword, cutting the ties that bind you to the bullshit that’s holding you back.
- When you’re in the shower, visualize the water hitting your crown chakra, washing away any heavy thoughts and limiting beliefs. Do this for each part of your body, releasing stress and tension as it trickles down.
- Open a window, light a sprig of sage and waft the smoke through your energetic field. As you do, set the intention that any lingering energies that do not contribute to your highest and greatest good be blown away with the smoke.
- DRINK. MORE. WATER. Whether you’re processing a lot or not (working out or not), water is what we’re made of, so the more we have of it in our system, the smoother things run. Water is a wonderful way of moving energy, so gift yourself a cuppa the good stuff.
- Spend a few minutes each day breathing deeply, focused on gratitude. This is so good for your brain (yay more Alpha waves!), and for your overall spirit. More about this in this post.
Bigger life-stuff that needs more than 5 minutes…
- Review your life honestly – what makes you feel SO GOOD (do more of that), and what’s been sucking all your energy? Make adjustments as necessary.
- Review your boundaries. Have you been people pleasing? Overgiving? Saying yes when you mean no? If you’re finding you have nothing left to give yourself at the end of the day, it’s time to review where you’ve dropped your boundaries so you can start plugging those energy leaks.
- Review your tools. Sometimes we forget that we know what to do when the shit hits the fan. Remind yourself. What crystals help you? What mantras? What prayers? Is there a song you like to chant? A ritual that always helps you rebalance? Do you need a massage/acupuncture/breathwork? If you don’t have tools in place, now is the time to start trying things to find what works.
All of this is possible for YOU, if you’re open to it. It doesn’t take years of studying the chakra systems, or becoming an aromatherapist. It doesn’t mean living in a cave at the top of the hill and meditating every day, removed from society. No more excuses, sweet one. Make it easy, because honestly, it IS easy. Commit to something that’s possible for you, and easy to work into your routine, so it’s easier to stick to. Start small and build on that. Consistent wins will move things forward, and THAT my friend, is a good thing.
One of the biggest issues I see my clients, friends and colleagues struggle with is having clear energetic boundaries in their work and their every day lives. Because let’s face it, the helpers, healers, and earth angel types are natural givers, and are often highly sensitive or empathic.
I’ve created this free guide to blend the call for energetic support, with my training and experience in aromatherapy and natural bath and body products. Inside this guide you’ll get 3 product blends and 3 essential oil blends, along with some extra goodies to make it all even juicier.